Creating a Parenting Plan That Works: Guidance for Oshawa Families

As a separating parent in Oshawa, Ontario, navigating the complexities of co-parenting and maintaining open communication can be challenging. One of the most crucial steps in this journey is creating a comprehensive parenting plan. Parenting plans in Oshawa and across Ontario help parents provide structure and stability for their children. This guide will walk you through the essentials of parenting plans, their benefits, and how to create one that serves the best interests of your child.

What is the Purpose of a Parenting Plan?

A parenting plan is a written agreement between separating or divorcing parents that outlines how they will raise their children after separation. In Oshawa, as in the rest of Ontario, parenting plans are crucial documents that help establish stability and routine for children during a potentially turbulent time.

These plans cover various aspects of child-rearing, including living arrangements, education, healthcare decisions, and more.

Parenting time refers to the specific periods during which the child stays with each parent. Having a clear, well-thought-out schedule can help minimize conflicts and provide predictability for the child. It is important to consider the child’s age, needs, and daily routine when drafting this schedule.

Why Parenting Plans Matter for Separating Couples in Oshawa

A clearly defined parenting plan is a crucial element for separating couples with children, serving as a comprehensive roadmap for co-parenting post-separation. This vital document outlines how parents will continue to care for and make decisions about their children, addressing key aspects such as residential arrangements and decision-making responsibilities. A well-crafted parenting plan provides stability for children, reduces conflict between parents, ensures continued involvement of both parents, and addresses important decisions regarding education, healthcare, and religious upbringing. The parenting plan can also be incorporated into a separation agreement to provide legal strength if disputes arise.”

Benefits of a Properly Designed Parenting Plan

Reduced Conflict: By clearly outlining expectations and responsibilities, a parenting plan minimizes misunderstandings and potential conflicts between co-parents.
Consistency for Children: A structured plan provides stability and predictability for children, which is crucial for their emotional well-being during and after separation.
Improved Communication: The process of creating a plan often improves communication between parents, setting a positive tone for future co-parenting.

Key Elements of Parenting Plans in Oshawa Ontario

Divorce often necessitates the creation of a comprehensive parenting plan. It’s crucial to address how the parents will continue to share responsibilities and maintain a healthy co-parenting relationship post-divorce. A well-structured plan can minimize conflict and provide stability for the child during this transition. Factors to consider include the division of parenting time, decision-making responsibilities, and effective communication strategies.

Parenting Time Schedule: This section outlines when the child will spend time with each parent. In Oshawa, this might include considerations such as:
1. Regular weekday and weekend schedules
2. Holiday and summer vacation arrangements
3. Accommodations for shift work or irregular work hours
4. Provisions for long-distance parenting if one parent moves out of the Oshawa area
Decision-Making Responsibilities: Oshawa parents need to decide how they will make important decisions regarding their child’s:
1. Education (e.g., school choice, tutoring, special education needs)
2. Healthcare (including choosing healthcare providers and making medical decisions)
3. Religious upbringing
4. Extracurricular activities
Communication Guidelines: Effective co-parenting requires clear communication. Your plan should address:
1. Preferred methods of communication (e.g., email, text, co-parenting apps)
2. Frequency of updates about the child
3. How to handle emergencies
4. Protocols for introducing new partners
Conflict Resolution Strategies: Despite best efforts, disagreements may arise, necessitating family dispute resolution. Your plan should include:
1. Steps for resolving minor disputes
2. Procedures for mediation or arbitration if needed
3. Circumstances under which the plan may be reviewed or modified

If conflict continues, Oshawa divorce mediation offers parents a structured and supportive way to resolve disputes.

Ontario’s “Best Interests of the Child” Standard Explained

In Ontario, the primary consideration in any parenting plan is the best interests of the child. This principle is protected in the Children’s Law Reform Act and considers factors such as:

The child’s physical, emotional, and psychological safety and well-being
The child’s relationships with parents, siblings, and other important people
The child’s views and preferences, where appropriate
Each parent’s willingness to support the child’s relationship with the other parent

Steps to Build a Practical and Personalized Parenting Plan

Here’s a step-by-step guide for creating a parenting plan for families in Oshawa:

Assess Your Family’s Needs:
1. Consider your children’s ages, schedules, and individual needs
2. Reflect on your family’s unique circumstances and challenges
Outline the Basics:
1. Determine the living arrangements (e.g., primary residence, shared residency)
2. Create a schedule for holidays and special occasions
Address Decision-Making Responsibilities:
1. Decide how major decisions (education, healthcare, religion) will be made
2. Establish a process for resolving disagreements
Plan for Communication:
1. Set guidelines for how and when parents will communicate
2. Determine how information about the children will be shared
3. Clear communication helps reduce conflict and supports healthy co-parenting after separation
Consider Financial Aspects:
1. Outline how child-related expenses will be handled
2. Address any child support arrangements
Establish Rules and Routines:
1. Agree on consistent rules across both households
2. Define routines for homework, bedtime, and other daily activities
Plan for Special Circumstances:
1. Address travel arrangements and permissions
2. Consider provisions for emergencies or unexpected events
Include Flexibility and Review Clauses:
1. Allow for adjustments as children grow and circumstances change
2. Set a schedule for reviewing and updating the plan
Discuss Extracurricular Activities:
1. Determine how these will be chosen, scheduled, and funded
2. Decide how transportation to activities will be handled
Address Extended Family Relationships:
1. Plan for maintaining relationships with grandparents and other relatives
2. Establish guidelines for introducing new partners to the children
Consult with Professionals:
1. Seek advice from an accredited mediator
2. Consider using a mediator with “Voice of the Child” certification if the children are old enough
Draft the Plan:
1. Write out the agreed-upon terms clearly and concisely
2. Ensure both parents understand and agree to all points
Review and Finalize:
1. Have both parents review the draft thoroughly
2. Make any necessary revisions before finalizing
Implement and Monitor:
1. Begin following the plan and observe how it works in practice
2. Be prepared to adjust as needed

The goal is to create a plan that serves the best interests of your children while providing a clear framework for both parents. Professional guidance can be invaluable in this process.

Common Questions About Parenting Plans in Oshawa

Can a 12-year-old decide which parent to live with in Oshawa, Ontario?

This is a common question in child custody cases in Oshawa, Ontario. Determining which parent a child lives with involves considering the child’s best interests, rather than basing the decision solely on a specific age. While a child’s preferences are considered, they are not the deciding factor.

Additional variables such as the child’s emotional connections and the stability of each parent’s environment play critical roles. It’s recognized that children at the age of 12 can express mature thoughts about their living situation.

Decision-making strives to be balanced and thoughtful, aiming to reflect the child’s evolving sense of voice and opinion while also ensuring their well-being and security. A child’s input may hold weight in the process, but it is one of many considerations.

The court assesses the child’s desires alongside various relevant factors to make a holistic determination. These include the ability of each parent to meet the child’s needs, the impact on the child’s mental and emotional health, and the stability offered by maintaining existing routines. Ultimately, every effort is made to harmonize the child’s wishes with what serves their long-term interests. Although a child’s opinion is significant, it is not regarded as the “final” determinant in such decisions.

How do we create an age-appropriate co-parenting schedule?

When crafting a co-parenting schedule, consider your child’s age and developmental needs:

Young children (0-3 years): Frequent, shorter timeframes with both parents. Gradually introduce overnights with the non-primary caregiver. A 2-2-3 schedule (2 days with the first parent, two days with the second parent, then 3 with the first parent, then switch) may work well at this age.
Preschool/Early Elementary (4-8 years): Longer periods with each parent become feasible. Maintain consistency and routine. A 2-2-5-5 schedule (2 days with each parent, then 5 days with each parent) may provide stability for this age group.
Older Children/Pre-teens (9-12 years): Extended periods with each parent may work well. Consider the child’s activities and social life. Alternating weeks may be suitable, with a midweek visit to the other parent.
Teenagers (13+ years): More flexible schedules to accommodate their busy lives. Consider their input on the schedule. Week-on, week-off schedules may be effective for many teens.

These are just guidelines, so tailor the schedule to your family’s unique situation, considering factors like siblings’ needs, parents’ work schedules, and distance between homes. Be prepared to adjust the schedule as your children grow and circumstances change. Regular reviews of the parenting plan can ensure it continues to meet your children’s evolving needs.

Are parenting plans legally binding?

Parenting plans are essential agreements between parents. These carefully constructed documents outline various aspects of a child’s upbringing following a separation, such as living arrangements, education, medical care, and holiday schedules.

Once these documents have been signed, witnessed, and dated, they become legally binding. This binding agreement then provides both parties with a structured framework, promoting stability in parenting responsibilities. Additionally, it provides parents with the reassurance that they have recourse through the legal system should conflicts arise.

Enforceable plans offer predictability and empower parents to cooperate with greater confidence in the agreed-upon terms. In Oshawa, Ontario, seeking an experienced mediator to help draft and solidify these plans is highly advisable. Doing so ensures that the plans align with legal standards and remain aligned with divorce applications in Ontario, effectively serving the best interests of the child.

We support families throughout Oshawa and surrounding communities, including:

With online mediation, our services are accessible throughout Durham Region and beyond.

Creating a parenting plan on your own can feel overwhelming — but you don’t have to do it alone. At Positive Solutions Divorce Services®, our accredited mediators specialize in family mediation in Oshawa, Ontario, helping parents design parenting plans that reduce conflict, support co-parenting after separation, and put children’s needs first.

👉 Schedule your free 30-minute joint consultation today to learn how divorce mediation in Oshawa can help you build a clear, practical, and legally binding parenting plan — without going to court.

📞 Toll-Free: 888-779-8777
📧 connect@positivesolutions.ca
🌐 www.positivesolutions.ca

“Changing the way couples separate in Oshawa Ontario”

Author: Bev Lewis

President and founder of Positive Solutions Divorce Services®
(416)-559-5527 | connect@positivesolutions.ca | positivesolutions.ca

The information provided in our blogs and throughout our website is intended for general educational purposes, offering insights into separation and divorce processes in Ottawa and throughout Ontario. While we make every effort to ensure our content is accurate and current, it should not be considered legal advice. Although we can provide legal information to help you understand the divorce process, we recommend consulting with a qualified family law lawyer to obtain legal advice specific to your situation.

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Frequently Asked Questions

What should be included in a parenting plan?

A parenting plan typically outlines the parenting schedule (days, holidays, vacations), decision-making responsibilities, communication protocols between parents and with the child, transportation arrangements, and guidelines for resolving disagreements.

How is parenting time determined in Ontario?

Parenting time is based on the best interests of the child, considering factors like the child’s needs, relationships with each parent, routines, and each parent’s ability to care for the child.

Can a parenting plan be changed after it's finalized?

Yes. Parenting plans can be revised if both parents agree or if there has been a significant change in circumstances. Mediation can assist if parents disagree on the changes.

What happens if one parent doesn’t follow the parenting plan?

If a parent fails to comply with the agreed-upon plan, the other parent can seek enforcement through family court or return to mediation to resolve the conflict.

Is mediation required to create a parenting plan?

While not mandatory, mediation is strongly encouraged as it promotes cooperation and helps parents create a plan tailored to their family’s unique needs without going to court.

Throughout the mediation process, we encourage open communication and creative problem-solving, often uncovering mutually beneficial solutions. Our goal is to help you create a separation agreement that provides clarity and stability during this transitional period, while also being flexible enough to adapt to future changes.

By choosing our mediation services for your separation agreement, you can often achieve a more personalized and comprehensive document than one created through traditional legal channels, potentially saving time, reducing costs, and laying the groundwork for a more amicable post-separation relationship.

A Separation Agreement is a legally binding document that outlines how separating spouses will divide parenting responsibilities, property, and finances after a relationship ends. At Positive Solutions Divorce Services®, we help couples create clear, enforceable Separation Agreements through mediation—without going to court.

Our trained mediators guide both partners through every topic that matters: parenting time, decision making, child support, spousal support, and property equalization. We offer a calm, structured environment where couples can resolve issues respectfully and affordably. Once decisions are made, we prepare a comprehensive agreement that can be reviewed by independent legal counsel and signed to become legally binding in Ontario.

*Separation Agreements Disclaimer

*The information included in a Separation Agreement, or other applicable documents, is purely a guide and cannot substitute for a lawyer’s skill, knowledge, and careful drafting. These documents are simply reflective of the information received from you and are an administrative service only.

Positive Solutions Divorce Services® does not warrant and is not liable or responsible for ensuring the validity and/or enforceability of any Agreement or clause in an Agreement and remains your full and sole responsibility. Full financial disclosure is a crucial element in the preparation of any Agreement. It is also critical that you understand your rights and obligations under existing law.

In many circumstances, the Agreement will be addressing complex assets and issues, such as corporations, trusts, pensions, tax implications etc. In these cases, it is imperative that the actual relevant documentation be reviewed and that the expertise of an accountant or specialist in the subject area be consulted to ensure that the Agreement properly addresses these complex assets and issues. It is strongly recommended that you retain Independent Legal Advice before signing any documentation arising out of the end of your marriage or common law relationship.

Frequently Asked Questions

What is a separation agreement?

A separation agreement is a legally binding contract between separating spouses that outlines how they will handle key issues such as parenting time, decision-making, child support, spousal support, and division of property.

Is a separation agreement legally enforceable in Ontario?

Yes. If properly drafted with full financial disclosure, signed voluntarily by both parties, and witnessed, it is enforceable in court under Ontario’s Family Law Act and Contracts Law.

Do I need a lawyer to create a separation agreement?

While not legally required, it is recommended that both parties obtain independent legal advice (ILA) before signing. This ensures the agreement is fair and helps prevent future legal challenges.

Can a separation agreement be changed after it’s signed?

Yes. It can be amended by mutual agreement if circumstances change. If there is disagreement, the matter may require mediation, negotiation, or a court application to vary the agreement.

What happens if one spouse doesn’t follow the separation agreement?

If a party breaches the agreement, the other may enforce it through court proceedings. The court can compel compliance, including orders for payment or changes in parenting time or support.

Frequently Asked Questions

How do I apply for a divorce in Ontario?

You must complete and file a divorce application with the Ontario Superior Court of Justice. This includes submitting a copy of your marriage certificate, any related court orders or agreements, and paying the required filing fees. You can file jointly or individually.

What are the grounds for divorce in Ontario?

The only legal ground for divorce in Canada is a breakdown of the marriage, which can be proven by:

One year of separation (most common),
Adultery, or
Physical or mental cruelty.

Can I apply for a divorce without going to court?

Yes. If all other matters (support, property, parenting) are resolved and documented (e.g., in a separation agreement), you can apply for an uncontested or joint divorce, which usually does not require a court appearance.

How long does it take to get a divorce in Ontario?

Once the application is submitted, an uncontested divorce typically takes about 2 to 3 months, depending on court processing times. Delays may occur if documentation is incomplete or if the application is contested.

Do I need a lawyer to file for divorce in Ontario?

No, a lawyer is not required, especially for uncontested or joint divorces. However, it’s wise to obtain legal information or assistance—particularly to ensure your documents are accurate before filing.

Frequently Asked Questions

What Are Domestic Contracts and Why Do I Need One?

A domestic contract is a legal agreement developed between two individuals—spouses, common-law partners, or couples planning to cohabit—to manage their rights, responsibilities, and expectations during a relationship or after separation. Common types include cohabitation agreements, marriage contracts (prenups), separation agreements, and post-divorce contracts.

These agreements help address important matters such as property division, financial support, and decision-making, setting clear expectations and preventing misunderstandings. They offer stability and peace of mind, particularly for couples entering a long-term partnership, blending families, or protecting assets from a previous marriage. Domestic contracts are legally binding when properly drafted, signed, and executed following Ontario guidelines. Investing in one now can reduce costly legal disputes and emotional stress later, while giving both parties transparency around financial and familial arrangements.

How Does the Domestic Contract Process Work?

Here’s a step-by-step summary of our domestic contract process:

Free Introductory Meeting: We’ll clarify the type of contract you want, answer initial questions, and explain how the process works.
Individual Intake Sessions: Each person meets privately with a mediator to gather personal goals, values, and relevant financial information.
Drafting Discussions: Parties and mediator work through key terms (asset protection, decision-making, support provisions, etc.), either in person or online.
Agreement Drafting: Mediators prepare a draft that reflects your discussions and intentions.
Review and Independent Legal Advice: Each person meets their lawyer to review the contract and ask questions.
Signing and Implementation: Once both parties sign, the contract becomes legally binding. We help with filing or registering it if necessary.
Follow-Up as Needed: Should circumstances change, you can revisit and revise the agreement.

This clear, collaborative pathway ensures your domestic contract aligns with both your needs and Ontario’s legal framework.

What Topics Can a Domestic Contract Cover?

Domestic contracts are highly customizable. Commonly addressed topics include:

Property and financial asset division, including bank accounts, investments, and real estate
Debt allocation, including student loans or mortgages
Spousal support terms, such as fixed amounts, duration, or waivers
Decision-making authority around children (when applicable)
Inheritance or estate planning considerations, especially for stepfamilies
Roles and financial responsibilities during the relationship
Business ownership interests or professional practice protection

We work with you to design an agreement that reflects your specific goals and realities. Our mediators guide both partners through open, respectful discussions to reach outcomes that fit your unique circumstances—whether emphasizing protection, clarity, or flexibility.

How Do You Ensure a Contract Is Legally Enforceable?

To make sure your domestic contract holds up in court, our process deeply focuses on key legal elements:

Full and accurate financial disclosure from both parties
Voluntary participation, ensuring no one is coerced
Clear and understandable language, without hidden clauses or ambiguity
Independent legal advice for each party prior to signing
Proper execution, including witnessing and notarization as required
Timely documentation, ensuring the agreement is signed and dated correctly

By following this framework, we help you create a strong, legally valid agreement that stands the test of time—and avoids future challenges around interpretation or legitimacy.

What Happens If Life Changes After Signing?

Life is rarely static—and your domestic contract should adapt with you. Whether you get married, have children, or experience a change in income, we can help modify your agreement to suit evolving needs.

Here’s how we guide updates:

We begin with a brief review session to identify which parts of your contract need attention.
New discussions follow about updated goals and circumstances.
Draft revisions are prepared to reflect those changes, with clear acknowledgment of the original contract.
Legal reviews and re-signing ensure the updated contract remains valid.

This adaptable process empowers you to maintain clarity and fairness as life shifts—while preserving the legal integrity and intent of your original agreement.

Frequently Asked Questions

How is spousal support determined?

Spousal support is based on several factors, including the length of the relationship, the roles each partner played during the relationship, each person’s financial situation, and whether there are children. The Spousal Support Advisory Guidelines (SSAGs) provide ranges for amount and duration.

Is spousal support mandatory after separation or divorce?

Not always. Eligibility depends on factors like financial need, the ability to pay, and any agreements made during the relationship. Spousal support is not automatic and may be negotiated or decided through mediation or by a court.

How long does spousal support last?

Duration depends on the length of the relationship and the recipient’s circumstances. A common guideline is 0.5 to 1 year of support for each year of cohabitation, but long-term relationships or those involving children may warrant indefinite support.

Can spousal support be changed after it’s been agreed upon or ordered?

Yes. Spousal support can be varied if there is a material change in circumstances (e.g., job loss, retirement, significant income change). This often requires mediation, negotiation, or court review.

Is spousal support tax deductible?

Spousal support payments are generally tax-deductible for the payer and taxable income for the recipient—but only if:

The payments are made periodically (e.g., monthly), not as a lump sum.
There is a written separation agreement or court order in place.
The support is clearly identified as spousal support (not child support).

Frequently Asked Questions

How is child support calculated in Ontario?

Child support is calculated using the Federal Child Support Guidelines, primarily based on the paying parent’s gross annual income and the number of children. The amount can vary depending on parenting time arrangements.

Do both parents have to pay child support?

Typically, the parent with less parenting time (or the one not primarily residing with the child) pays support. However, in shared parenting arrangements, both parents’ incomes are considered, and a set-off approach may apply.

What income is used for child support calculations?

Gross annual income from all sources is used, including employment, self-employment, commissions, rental income, and certain benefits. Line 15000 of the tax return (previously Line 150) is commonly referenced.

Can child support be adjusted over time?

Yes. Child support is reviewed and adjusted if there is a significant change in income, parenting arrangements, or the child’s needs. Annual income disclosure is often required.

Does child support cover extracurricular activities or school expenses?

No. Basic child support covers food, clothing, and shelter. Special or extraordinary expenses (like daycare, medical costs, or extracurriculars) are separate and typically shared proportionally based on each parent’s income.

Frequently Asked Questions

What is property equalization in Ontario?

Property equalization is the process of dividing the increase in value of each spouse’s net worth accumulated during the marriage. The spouse with the higher net family property pays half the difference to the other spouse.

How is net family property (NFP) calculated?

NFP is calculated by subtracting the value of assets and debts on the date of marriage from the value of assets and debts on the date of separation. Certain exclusions and deductions (like inheritances or gifts) may apply

What property is excluded from equalization?

Excluded property includes inheritances, gifts from third parties, personal injury awards, and certain insurance proceeds, if kept separate from joint assets. The matrimonial home is not excluded, even if it was inherited or owned before marriage.

Does property equalization apply to common-law couples in Ontario?

No. Property equalization under the Family Law Act applies only to married spouses. Common-law partners are not automatically entitled to a share of each other’s property and must rely on trust claims or specific agreements.

Can spouses agree to divide property differently than equalization rules?

Yes. Spouses can negotiate their own terms in a separation agreement, which can differ from what the law provides, as long as both parties disclose their finances and the agreement is fair and voluntarily entered into.

By addressing these important legal and financial matters through mediation, couples can reduce conflict, save money, and reach mutually beneficial solutions without going to court.

Throughout the process, we maintain a neutral stance, ensuring that both parties’ voices are heard, and their interests are considered. Our goal is to help you reach a comprehensive separation agreement that addresses all aspects of your separation, while minimizing conflict and preserving important relationships. By choosing our mediation services, you can navigate your separation with greater control, reduced stress, and significant cost savings compared to traditional litigation. Positive Solutions Divorce Services provides professional mediation services to families across Ontario, helping couples in cities like Toronto, Ottawa, Mississauga, and beyond reach fair and amicable agreements.

Schedule a Free Online Meeting for Mediation Services in Ontario

Frequently Asked Questions

What types of issues can mediation help us resolve?

Mediation through Positive Solutions supports nearly every aspect of separation. Our trained mediators guide couples through key topics like parenting plans, including schedules and decision-making; child and spousal support calculations based on Ontario and federal guidelines; property equalization for fair division of assets and debts; drafting separation agreements; and the divorce application process itself. We also assist with domestic contracts such as cohabitation or prenuptial agreements. Our goal is to provide a comprehensive, one-stop mediation solution that helps you finalize all separation-related matters without needing multiple professionals or a court battle—saving you time, money, and stress.

How does the mediation process work?

Divorce mediation at Positive Solutions follows a structured and supportive process:

Free, joint consultation to introduce mediation and learn about your situation.
Individual intake sessions, where you’ll complete financial checklists and explore concerns privately.
Joint mediation meetings in-person or online, where we address parenting, finances, support, and property.
Drafting your Separation Agreement, reflecting your jointly reached decisions.
Legal review (strongly recommended) before signing the agreement.
Final session to outline and confirm next steps (e.g., filing divorce, implementing changes).

This approach provides clarity, fairness, and a plan personalized to your family’s needs—without court involvement.

Can mediation save us money and time compared to going to court?

Yes—mediation is typically much faster and more affordable than traditional litigation. Court cases can drag on for months or years and involve high legal fees. Mediation, on the other hand, usually concludes in 4–8 sessions over a few months, and our flat-fee packages are transparent with optional payment plans. Because you maintain control over decisions and timing, mediation allows for quicker resolutions—and avoids court scheduling delays, motion costs, and unpredictable outcomes. For many of our clients, this means saving thousands of dollars and protecting family budgets during a challenging life transition.

What role does confidentiality play in mediation?

Confidentiality is a cornerstone of our mediation process. Unlike court hearings, which are public, mediation sessions remain private—nothing discussed is part of public record. This allows couples to speak honestly without fear. Mediators adhere to professional confidentiality standards, and any notes taken are securely stored or destroyed. The only exceptions involve legal obligations, such as threats of harm or child protection concerns. Confidentiality helps maintain dignity and trust throughout the process and enables more open, constructive communication.

What happens if we can’t agree on something during mediation?

While mediation aims for comprehensive agreement, it’s flexible if you encounter roadblocks. Mediators will help you explore options, break complex issues into manageable steps, or refer you to specialists—like financial advisors or therapists—as needed. If a specific topic remains unresolved, you can pause mediation or choose targeted legal advice on that point. Importantly, the rest of your agreement can still move forward while specific issues are addressed separately. Our goal is to help you reach as much agreement as possible, while respecting your unique circumstances and pacing.